There is probably nothing more challenging than dating as a gay man. Not only is the pool of people you can date smaller, but apart from that, you have to take out those who are already taken, then those who you simply don’t want to date. And where does that leave you? On top of that all, things become even more difficult if you’re an introvert. Introvert guys find it more challenging to approach new people and show who they truly are – especially if they like the guy (come on, this is also difficult for extroverts as well). But what can you, as an introvert, do before your first date? How are you supposed to behave, and most importantly, where do you find the courage to be who you want to be?
Engage in conversation as much as possible
If you’re an introvert, this might seem easier said than done, but try to engage in the conversation as much as possible. This means that you will have to play the moderator of the date, just in case your partner is also a shy or quiet guy. This engagement is not a difficult task; what you need to do is ask questions about himself and give answers about your own life. Make sure that there is never silence. Talk about anything. Talk about your life, your interests; talk about the waiters or the restaurant where you are; and talk about your family or friends. All of these categories can be incredibly helpful in creating small talk. If you have nothing else on your mind, you can always talk about favorite TV shows or albums (Lady Gaga’s new album might be a good conversation starter for 2020!)
Come dressed to kill
To be entirely sure of yourself during the date, you will have to boost your confidence. One of the best ways to do so is to wear the best clothes that you have. No, we’re not saying that you should come smartly dressed, but you should definitely go with the clothes that you feel very comfortable in. To be even more fashionable (which is a trait your date will like), add men’s fashion accessories to make your look more interesting and to add a certain depth to the outfit. The accessories might range from watches to necklaces and rings – it’s up to you and your style. Being sure of what you’re wearing, and most importantly liking it can do wonders for your confidence.
Remember that getting out of the comfort zone is a good thing
Going out on a date as an introvert guy is the embodiment of the phrase, “getting out of the comfort zone.” Our comfort zone is usually a place or a situation where we can catch our breath and function without any difficulties. That’s why getting out of it is so difficult – no one likes it when they have to face new and uncomfortable situations. But that is precisely why it is crucial to know that stepping out of your comfort zone is not a bad thing – it’s something that can make us stronger in the future. So get your strength and do it once, you will see that every other time will be easier.
Select a venue where you will be comfortable
You already have a lot on your plate by choosing to go on a date with someone you don’t know, so what you want to do is make the whole situation much more comfortable. One way to ensure this is by choosing a venue that you know and that you feel comfortable in. This might be your crib (if that’s what you want), or your favorite pub or coffee place. Make sure that you are the one who will choose the venue - this will calm your nerves as you will have a familiar sight around you.
Dating is never easy, but it might be a bit less easy if you’re an introvert. This is not something that you can change about yourself overnight, but you can definitely try and change this about you.